Speeding Cars
– Imogen Heap

here’s the day you hoped would never come
don’t feed me violins
just run with me through rows of speeding cars
the papercuts, the cheating lovers
the coffee’s never strong enough
i know you think it’s more than just bad luck

there there, baby
it’s just text book stuff
it’s in the ABC of growing up
now now, darling
don’t lose your head
none of us were angels
and you know I love you, yeah

sleeping pills know, sleeping dogs lie
never far enough away
glistening in the cold sweat of guilt
I’ve watched you slowly winding down for years
you can’t keep on like this
now’s a bad a time as any

there there, baby
it’s just text book stuff
it’s in the ABC of growing up
now now, darling
don’t kill yourself
none of us were angels
and you know I love you, yeah

it’s ok by me
it was a long time ago

___

Here’s a song to usher in the new year. It’s been a long time since I wrote anything down like this, but I feel compelled to now – it is the first of January, after all.

It was nice meeting 2010 face on in Paris with a good friend I haven’t seen in a long time, but even that, the Eiffel Tower in all its glory, the two scoops of precious Berthillion ice cream, the croissants and macaroons, the rocky seasides and choppy waters of Malta, the golden, arrogant arch of the Azure Window at sunset, the entire bus saying and waving bye-bye to us when we stepped off our enchanting little yellow bus in Paola…still cannot make up for time I feel I have lost and wasted this term.

I feel estranged from my emotions, from things I have loved and love still, from people I promised to keep in touch with, from all my personal, long-entrenched priorities. And all these beautiful moments, these defining sights and sounds, still seem unable to reach out to this detached part of me.  So I may have found it back somewhat over the last week or so. Yet as 2010 looms, it seems to be slowly, surely, creeping its way into the dark again.

Someone I talked to today said he is looking for himself. The true him. Isn’t that cheesy? But isn’t that so real to most people?

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